Another Meeting

Meetings around here are AWESOME! Invariably, how to use the toilet will come up, as will a number of other random things. There is video of the toilet speech today, but the site manager said I couldn't post any photos of him, and especially no video. So, sad for you, my dear readers. All 3 or 4 of you. No video of the toilet speech.

And sadly, there wasn't as much masturbation talk as one would have hoped. Please don't get me wrong, I understand the epic seriousness of how wrong it is for a man to be whacking off in a sink in the women's toilet trailer. But if you don't laugh around here, you'll go NUTS. And in my case, it's not that long of a trip. Some would say, I've already taken that trip. And, hell, they might be right. But anyway.

Oh, and then we had a meeting after the meeting. But this one was just for people with vaginas. Not people with sand in their vaginas, because that could be anyone. Actual cooters. Apparently, there has been too much cattiness and it needs to stop. A good portion of the things mentioned in the communal living rant were discussed at the post-meeting meeting. The lone female supervisor has been designated, for lack of a better term, our 'den mother'. I had no idea I was coming to a flippin' boarding school for crazy junior high chicks. It's insane how catty some of these chicks are. It's mostly in the other tent though, and I'm happy to keep it that way. One of the girls wants management to put a lock on the women's toilet and shower trailers and give us all keys. WTF? How are all the military girls, who are mandated to use the DynCorp shower, due to Afghan Army asshats being, well, asshats, supposed to get in? Keys for everyone? And then when someone loses a key, rekey the lock and make 6000 more keys? Hi, welcome to Howz-e Madad Locks 'R' Us. Oh wait ... THAT DOESN'T EXIST! Cipher locks were suggested, but shot down by Den Mother, because the combo will get out, which is true enough, but it would make some of the girls feel better. Whatever. If I catch a boy in the girl's toilet or shower unit, then I'm punching him, taking his badge, and dragging him by the ding-ding to the site manager. Done and done.

Anywho, so no excellent "where to masturbate" stories ... just don't do it in the sink in the women's restroom. Hmmm ... now that I think about it, they never specifically forbade masturbating in the sinks in the *men's* toilet trailer.

'Til next time, stay safe, know where your nearest bunker is, and don't walk around with open-toed shoes ... you'll get written up.